Mar 12, 2020
Episode 83 is an interview with Kristen Goodman, a mom to four daughters as well as a life coach. Kristen shares how to deal with overwhelm and perfectionism, value connection over control and seek intention to see God’s guidance in motherhood.
Give Up Overwhelm + Perfectionism
Kristen shares her early experiences in motherhood with everything she thought she “should” be doing.
She talks about an epiphany where she realized the feelings of overwhelm weren’t from the Spirit.
We discuss how overwhelm and perfectionism are tools Satan uses to target mothers.
Kristen also shares how prayer, therapy and finding life coaching helped her to realize she wasn’t responsible for others’ thoughts and feelings.
She reveals how she discovered she could only be responsible for her own thoughts and feelings and recognized that motherhood was a choice. Both of these things helped her let go of overwhelm and perfectionism.
Connection over Control
Kristen discusses how once she learned she wasn’t responsible for others’ feelings, she could also let go of trying to control her kids.
She shares how the result of letting go of control also meant she was letting go of conflict.
We talk about the balance of pushing your kids versus allowing them to make their own decisions.
Ultimately, Kristen shared why you have to go with the Spirit and know your child. She shared the belief you are the mom to your kids for a reason and you have to trust yourself.
Through her own journey, Kristen talks about how she has learned to truly connect with her daughters. She offers advice to any parenting wanting to connect and build a better relationship with their child.
Using Intention to See God’s Guidance
Kristen’s overall message is that you can see the hand of God in your life every single day. She shares how being intentional is key to seeing your heavenly parents as your partners in motherhood.
Kristen’s Quotes
- “I knew my feelings I was having and being overwhelmed weren’t coming from the spirit, and that’s not the way Heavenly Father wanted me to feel.”
- And that ultimately led me to the thought that was creating all of my overwhelm, which was that I could control, and I was responsible for my kids and how they felt and how they succeeded. I felt like I could control and be responsible for them in that way, which wasn’t true. “You can’t control your kids, especially as they get older, which is why I love talking to parents of teenagers. I really feel like that is a hard stage of life where you have to let them figure things out. And I’m so glad that I don’t feel like I need to have that control over them anymore because it really creates such a conflict.”
- “Creating that space where I feel connected to them has just really changed the way I parent because I really want to keep that relationship.”
- “I really feel like I intentionally look at the things going on around me in my life and I can find things every single day where my heavenly parents are leading me in the direction that I need to go or helping me out with one thing or another every single day because I’m looking for it.”
Episode Links
Book Kristen Mentioned: How to Talk So Your Kids Will Listen and Listen So Your Kids Will Talkby Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
Scripture about overcoming the natural man: Mosiah 3:19
Listen to Related Episodes
SMM 015: Balance + Overcoming
Feelings of Failure + True Self-Care in Motherhood || Elise
Curtis
SMM 037: How to Create Thoughts
to Love Your Children Better || Lisa Funk
SMM 049: How to Pursue What
Will Really Make You Happy in Motherhood|| Richard and Linda
Eyre
SMM 052: How to Really Define
Success in Motherhood||Chantel Allen
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Instagram: @kristengoodmancoaching
Website: kristengoodmancoaching.com
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